I update less and less now. Too busy with job searching and other crap that I have to remember to do. *a job that I just applied for (literally minutes earlier), has called me for an appointment.* Ok, back to the original program. This job is a an assistant to a Mortgage Loan officer. She wants me to make a flyer to see how I do. I’m kinda excited, but not really, the job seems to be kinda boring, but if it pays $10+commission, then I’m interested. It says “Potential $3,600 mo”, which is HARD to believe. I’ll see if it’s nice. I hope things turn out to be better…

Things just continue to be so confusing. I’m so stressed out. I don’t think I have ever been like this in my whole life. Things are just falling down, I’m really losing hope in everything. Why does it have to be so difficult? Why do things have to be so complicated? Why does the devil keep fucking with me? I’m on the verge of exploding. I’m REALLY going insane. I’m losing my mind. I can’t function properly. I’m frustrated and anxious all the time with everything I do. I can’t stand sitting here at work because I can’t stay seated. I’m like a robot that wants to rebel. I don’t…